i’m about to marry a youth pastor…

I asked my fiance (Allie) to write a little post for me. Well, actually, she wanted to write. You see, Allie has a very pretty blog that is geared towards her art and design career. She wanted a place to rant, so i’m sharing my space with her (i think I’ll be doing this a lot more in the future…). Here are her ramblings:


-I’m Skeptical-

So I’m about to marry a youth pastor. When I tell people that, I receive one of two reactions.

“Oh you aaarrre? I had no idea that you two were called into full-time ministry.”


“Oh wow. Aren’t you brave. That’s a lot of work! Are you ready for that?”

Okay, pardon me? I believe I said, “I’m going to marry a youth pastor.” Not, “I’m becoming a youth pastor.”

Don’t get me wrong, I am so excited to be involved in the church, to stand by my husband and support him, and to build relationships with students and focus on being an example to the girls. But I get skeptical when I hear comments like that. Instead, I want to be able to let people know that I have my own passions and my own career with my family being top priority. I am an individual who is marrying a man who happens to be called “youth pastor” by profession. I hope that churches all over can realize that their staff don’t come with a bonus full- (or part-) time staff member.

I hope that churches and their staff can see that the pastor’s family has talents and gifts that they can contribute to the church in so many other ways. My next post will feature some things that I am really looking forward to as I become a youth pastor’s wife.

(guest blogger: allie)


5 responses to this post.

  1. Allie,

    While you may think you are “only” marrying a youth pastor, you have in a very large part now become part of that youth ministry. The part in the bible where it talks about two becoming one, it also applies to careers.

    My dad is a pastor, and I’ve seen how things work with the ministry and marriage. There are some variables which are different, since Adam’s a youth pastor and my dad’s the main pastor, and my dad’s church is probably a lot smaller than Adam’s church, but I’m 110% positive that your role in that church will be more than you expected. Not that that’s a bad thing, but it will be very unexpected. So just be prepared in a year or two when you look back and wonder what you got yourself into.


  2. […] what she’s excited about in terms of marrying a youth pastor. Last week, she wrote about what she’s skeptical of, this week, she’s going for the positive. Check it […]


  3. Allie,
    You will find out very quickly that many churches will want you to become a “2 for 1 package deal” when it comes to the youth ministry. What I suggest is that you find your niche….where you want to serve in the youth ministry and where you want to serve outside of the youth ministry.

    Many people become shocked when I ask to do something in the church that doesn’t have to do with the youth….I quickly remind them that I am not the one who was hired. 🙂

    So…that means, you don’t HAVE to be at all the retreats and you don’t HAVE to lead a Bible study and you don’t HAVE to be at every youth gathering….for you, it’s a choice…and in my opinion, that makes it a little bit better.


  4. Hey all. Allie wrote a follow up post on what she’s excited about. It’s a bit more peppy and “feel good.”



  5. Posted by ruth juliet on June 23, 2009 at 7:23 am


    i wish to marry a pastor!!! If anyone read this please approach me on kmruthjuliet at hotmail


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